attached.

"i will begin again
but i can't start until
i've seen the end"
-foo fighters, end over end

the end is usually the first thing i think of. i'm not sure why. maybe i'm negative. over the next few weeks, all the people that started here in january/february, leave. also we get a whole bunch of new people. it would be easy to get attached here. in the beginning, i was. and then it turned around. it's amazing how one day, can totally screw you up. the day for me was the day my stuff got stolen. that put a bitter taste in my mouth, and that taste hasn't fully gone away. kind of like throwing up. you can wash your mouth, you can brush your teeth, but that taste doesn't fully go away. and then things remind you of it. like when i can't find the right song on the shuffle i bought to temporarily replace my real ipod. or when i can't tell if my phone is getting or sending texts. the little reminders bring back that bad taste.

in the next weeks, we get new CP's. i'm excited. i hope i can get along with them.

"oh my god, is this
really what you want?
would you tell us if it's not
and could you re-write the plot,
and come and get us?
cause we can't stop,
doing all the things we want
and even though we know it's not,
this place is merely a subplot,
to come and get us."
-wild sweet orange, ten dead dogs.

even though i know it's not, this place seems like it's more and more of a subplot each day. and i think i'm ok with that.